Why Johnny moved to Canby

It's almost time for another weekly edition of Willamette Weed & Mushroom, but I'm still thinking about their story from last week, about how the public schools in Portland are losing students fast. At the elementary school level, they've got 4300 fewer students than they did four years ago. That's a decrease of more than 17 percent.

The article runs down a whole list of reasons why it's happening. With six gunfire incidents at the city's public schools in 2022, they're more dangerous places than they ever were. Parents notice that kind of thing. And if you can afford to live in Portland, you might also be able to afford private school for your kids, where things are safer.

But the No. 1 reason for the enrollment drop seems to be that there are fewer school age kids in Portland these days. Families are fleeing for the suburbs and beyond. Who wants to raise their kids in a dirty, expensive, dangerous, depressing city with high taxes and a dead downtown? The grass is greener in Clackistan or the 'Couve.

And although the Weed wouldn't dare mention it, let's face it, the City Hall "transportation" bureaucrats are firmly dedicated to making life miserable for anybody who drives a car. If you've got school-age kids, you're in the car or the van seven days a week. According to the smug "planners" collecting paychecks on the taxpayer dime, you're supposed to cart the kids around in a trailer behind a bicycle. Okay, sure.

Portland has been showing us for years that if you have a family, a car, and a real life, they want you out of here. Clear out for the "creative" hipsters and the junkie housing projects. People are getting the message, loud and clear.

Being able to send your kids to public school was once a major calling card for the City of Roses. But those days are over, and they ain't coming back for a long time, if ever. Go by streetcar!